Christmas Magic and a Tree Tutorial

f 4.5, 1/8, ISO 500

My friend Rachel loves Halloween.  She has a Halloween yard party every year and she goes all out. It's totally awesome.  But her love of Halloween is surpassed by her love of Christmas.  She pulls her tree out of the attic as soon as she can get those Halloween decorations put away.  Now, I confess, I'm a bit of a holiday purist.  I like to finish Thanksgiving before we begin Christmas.  But the freedom to be individuals is one of the things I love most about America.  If Christmas is that awesome and special to you, then by all means, go all out as soon as you want to.

I stopped by Rachel's house in November and saw her amazing mantle and tree scene.  She lives in this amazing old home full of architectural wonder.  I just LOVE visiting and looking at it.  Adding seasonal decor just puts it over the top.  It just seemed so idyllic.  A scene out of a Norman Rockwell painting.

As the weeks slipped by, I couldn't get that visual image out of my mind.  The darkness outside.  The glow of the tree lights.  The white mantle.  The stockings.  All I needed was an adorable little girl in a nightgown and my camera.  I asked Rachel if I could use her family for my own creative outlet, and she agreed.

I finally made it happen last Friday night.  This December is proving to be as crazy busy as all Decembers for our family have been, but I put this little creative project on top priority. I needed it for my own sanity.  It was so much fun to play and create these images.  (And Rachel and Greg were really awesome to accommodate me and all my demands!)  I already have ideas for how to do it again next year!

f 6.3, SS 1/4, ISO 500

f 4.5, ss 1/8, ISO 500

f 2.0, ss 1/40, ISO 800

How did I shoot it? Here's a quick Christmas Tree Tutorial.

First, a tripod is a MUST.  An absolute MUST.  The shutter speed is going to be held open too long for even the best hand holder.

Second, stop down that aperture.  (you're shooting in manual, right????)  I'm used to shooting at f2.0-f2.8 on my prime lenses when I'm shooting the kids.  But for these scenes, you want ALL of it to be in focus, not just the eye lashes.  So bump it on up to f4, or f6.  You'll compensate with that slower shutter speed and ISO if you need to.  (you can see my settings as the captions on each photo above)

To get starbursts on the lights, you need a 'higher number' aperture.  I wish I'd tried going to f10 or f11 and bumping up my ISO to compensate.  None of these have super twinkly starbursts.  The kids were being as still as they possible could, so 1/4 and 1/8 is really as low as I could go in the shutter speed.  Just experiment - the tripod is your friend!  opens up a land of shutter speeds you don't ordinarily see.

Third, be ready to change the white balance.  Every Nikon I've ever owned has shot "cool", so I'm used to warming my images up, always.  But for these images, auto white balance shot too WARM.  So I actually cooled these images down before I edited them.  This lighting is just a little different, so just as you are going to be shooting in manual for the aperture, shutter and Iso, you will want to manually adjust the white balance.



I shot these with my Nikon D800
Nikon 50mm 1.4D

Elf on the Shelf Letter from Santa

Welcome!  I'm so amazed and honored at the attention this post has received!  I'm so glad you are here.  I'd love it if you "liked" my Facebook page so we can stay connected!  You should see the little like box over there to the right!  Thank you!  I can't wait to get to know you, too.  Our elf has arrived for 2014 and I'll be sharing his antics this year as well!

--

As I sat down to prepare for the arrival of Jolly, our Elf on the Shelf, I realized that some may be inspired by the wording of our letter from Santa. I wrote last week about why we do Santa and Elf on the Shelf, yet we don't embrace the behavior component of these traditions. My Santa letter goes along with that, and I wanted to share that with all of you. Jolly leaves a note every day of his own, but he always bring a letter from Santa at the start of Christmas season, too.  He'll be holding the wrapped up version as he parachutes down.

I used letterhead like this that I found at Office Depot.  I will keep it separate to use each year just for the Santa letter.  I used the font Traveling Typewriter (free on Dafont) for the letter, in Word.  I use little parachute men every year for Jolly's arrival.  One package should last you through the kids' childhood.  

Here is the text of the letter, in case you'd like to use it. 

---------------------------------------------

Ho Ho Ho!  Merry Christmas!

Greetings from the North Pole!

I have watched you both grow and change all year long and I am so proud of how you are growing up. I know you two have been anxiously awaiting Jolly’s arrival, and I am happy to send him to you today! Remember that each morning you must search to find his new spot for the day, but please do make sure you do not fight over who locates Jolly first. Embrace the true spirit of Christmas joy, happiness, generosity, and compassion. Encourage each other and celebrate together!

Do make sure you tell Jolly what you wish your gift from me will be. He will fly back to the North Pole each night while you sleep to deliver the message. Be very sure not to touch him, though, so his magic remains.

You may hear your friends or grown ups talk about a naughty or nice list. Some people believe that I have one, but that is just a rumor. It is not true. I do care whether you are good, obey your parents, and are kind to everyone, because those are the right things to do. But that doesn’t affect my love for you or whether I will give you a gift. I give you a gift as a symbol of the gift of Jesus to us from our God.

I wish you both, Kid1 and Kid2, a special Christmas season full of magic and cheer and Christmas joy.

Until Christmas Eve, Merrily Yours,
         Santa
---------------------------------------------

Find all my other Elf on the Shelf posts here.   And if you need to find an elf of your very own, you can always find one at my favorite Amazon here.

Disclaimer:  this post does contain amazon affiliate links.

Why we DO Santa and Elf on the Shelf

If you are someone who is on the fence about whether your family wants to introduce the concept of "Santa" to your children, this post is for you.



I wanted to share what our Elf, Jolly, did for our 2012 Christmas season.  But first, let me explain why we do Santa.  [No judging, please.  I don't judge you, so please don't judge me.  We all have the privilege of making our own decisions about how we raise our families.  I only wish to share mine, in case there is someone who is like me several years ago and wondering what the various options are.  If you don't do Santa, super!  If you do do Santa, rock on!]

Our Elf on the Shelf tradition is one of my most favorite things we've done with our children. It has inspired within them a love of things whimsical, fun, unexpected, and magical.  I'm fairly certain my oldest child, who is incredibly analytical, logical, and just plain thinky, has put two and two together. He knows it isn't possible that there is a Santa.  He knows that tiny elves who do stuff aren't real.  He's very much aware of what is fantasy and what is reality.  But all the same, his little 7 year old self embraces wholeheartedly the magic around our Christmas season.  He wants to prolong the fun.

Did you see what writer Refe Tuma said about his creation of Dinovember?  Read the whole post here.  I love what he says at the very end.

"Why do we do this? Because in the age of iPads and Netflix, we don’t want our kids to lose their sense of wonder and imagination. In a time when the answers to all the world’s questions are a web-search away, we want our kids to experience a little mystery. All it takes is some time and energy, creativity, and a few plastic dinosaurs. 

Childhood is fleeting, so let’s make sure it’s fun while it lasts."

I could not agree more!!!  I value imagination so, so, so much.  Their sense of wonder is so important.  I do not want to be the reason that their flame of imagination dies out.   I want to inspire their imaginations, and I want their home to be a place that is always, always filled with FUN and fond traditions.  To engage their imaginations now is to awaken their sense of wonder and prepare it for bigger and better things as they grow.

Christmas is about the birth of Jesus in our family.  That is the entire point.   Yet, our children are young.  While they are little, we chose to embrace Santa and welcome him into our home.  I understand why those who choose to deny Santa do - the trouble with lying to your children, and the focus on stuff instead of Jesus.  Yet, we've decided to embrace this tradition.  Here is why.

Santa is a symbol for Jesus, to me.  

Just as a wreath is a symbol of God's love, because a circle never ceases just as God's love never ceases.  Just as we give gifts, as a symbol of the gift of Jesus to us from God, and the gifts that were given to Jesus by the wise men.  Just as the candy cane is a symbol of the Shepherd's staff, who first noticed the star when Jesus was born.  Just as the Christmas Tree is a symbol of hope and life, because it is an evergreen that does not loose its needles over the winter and promises that the rest of nature will reawaken in Spring to new life, just as Jesus gives us hope and ever lasting life.

Santa is a symbol for the Spirit of Christmas:  

a celebration of the birth of Christ, who came to save the world from the consequences of their brokenness.  Santa loves and gives unconditionally (in our family we have no naughty or nice list), just as Jesus loves us and came to ultimately give us the unconditional gift of grace.  Santa is meant to point our children toward Jesus, not detract or distract.  The things that attract us to Santa, are the same things we love about Jesus.  There is a parallel.  Santa is a tangible concept that young children can comprehend.  And he teaches them to believe in something they've not seen, not heard, and not touched.   Santa points toward a bigger truth, that their young minds aren't fully ready to grasp.  And yet, there is still mystery surrounding Santa.  The things he does seem impossible.  I want them to wrestle with the concept that they cannot make sense of every little detail.  I want them to come to grips with the fact that they don't have to understand it all, to be the recipient of his blessings.

Not all children are the same.  But I do feel this belief in something he couldn't see, feel or touch, has been a blessing to my son.  His analytical, logical, processing mind from the early age of 2 would give me unanswerable questions about God.  "But WHY can't we SEE him?  Why can't see SEE heaven?  WHERE is it? "  He just wouldn't let up.  And at 2, 3, 4... he didn't have the intellectual development to handle the answers.  He could not reconcile it.  But I must wonder if Santa helped to bridge the gap.  He's never seen Santa.  He's never spoken to him or heard his voice.  He's never touched Santa.  But he knows, or at least knew for a time, that Santa still existed.  It helped him draw connections in his head while he needed them.  That there are things in this world that are, without our need to see, feel, hear.

Traditions and fun are important for me to foster in our family.  The Elf on the Shelf has been a most wonderful addition to our Christmas festivities.  He has helped my children, who tend to be very "stuff" focused by nature, broaden their concept of Christmas.  The magic of Christmas to my young children hasn't been just about Santa and presents.  It has also been about the antics of our elf.  It has done my heart good to see them enjoy Jolly, look forward to what he'll do next, and be less concerned about what Santa will bring them.  Yes, I want them to ultimately understand that Christmas is only about Jesus.  They know that, in their heads.  I hope this helps them shift into that appreciation as they grow up.  I hope that the way they feel about our Christmas magic transfer over to how they feel toward Jesus, as they become intellectually able to grasp the mystery of Jesus and just what a gift He has given us is.

And it has done my own grown up, distracted, responsible, anxiety-girl heart some wonderful good to take the time to focus on FUN during our Christmas season.  It has been a tangible thing that reminds me each year how important traditions and fun are to them, and how good to makes me feel when I stop being so task oriented and just have fun for a bit.  While I value cultivating their imaginations, life does get the best of me.  I get boggled down by burdens and to do lists, often.  I look forward to permission to focus on fun.


Now, for last Christmas's Elf on the Shelf antics.  I bit off a little bit more than I could chew last December.  Let's just say, the "photograph your elf every day" project crashed and burned.  These were the ones I managed to photograph.  And then a few days in, it just switches from my real camera to my iPhone.  That's okay.  The memories are still there, and that's really the point.

Jolly always parachutes to arrive, and brings a note from Santa and himself.





I loved this idea I found on Pinterest, of putting Jolly in his Lighting McQueen bedroom slipper.  I enhanced it with a paper road and the rest of his Cars cars.  They LOVED this one.


After watching us bake copycat Starbucks Cranberry Bliss bars all day, he couldn't resist having one himself.  Especially since the kids had wanted to share it with him.



He loves to watch movies that are associated with his friends at the North Pole.


Jolly gets to ride the airplane in my son's room to the North Pole each year, getting a "night off" from flying.


Jolly borrowed my daughter's special blanket, because he needed something to snuggle with.


He made himself into a snow globe.  I thought this was awesome.  They were not so impressed.


He donned a pair of reading glasses and read from the Jesus Storybook Bible to all the stuffed animals.  Can't you see they are rapt with attention?


Jolly brought them car Rudolph antlers.  They LOVED this. I mean, they LOVED it.


Imitation Elf Ice Cream?  Apparently Reddi Whip fits the bill.


Jolly has always wanted to go on a Safari, but the North Pole hasn't afforded such a luxury.  He had to take advantage of the fern and the jungle animals.  Can you see his little safari hat?


He brought the kids real donuts, and had elf donuts with the Calico Critters.




I made the box template in photoshop and cut it out with an exact knife. I dipped the cheerios in frosting and then in sprinkles. super easy.

He took a spin down the stairs via a roll of toilet paper, and left them some elf jokes.

What is the favorite food of elves? "Elf"aghetti 

How do elves get to the top of Santa's workshop? They use the "elf"avatar

What is the first thing elves learn in school? The "elf"abet


I am super excited to have a whole new year of Elf on the Shelf antics.  Anyone have a suggestion of what we should do?

Be the one! A phrase on gratitude

Emily picked up her backpack and came to give her mom a hug goodbye. It was morning. Bold, crisp rays of sunshine poured through the kitchen, touching the empty breakfast bowls on the counter. Mom smiled warmly and said, "I love you, Emily. Have a great day at school! Be the one!" Fred trudged by in his characteristic drowsy morning state, but managed a smile at his mom. "Be the one, Fred!" Mom told him with a squeeze to his shoulders. A few minutes later, Sammy whizzes by and runs out the door, trying to make it down the driveway in time to catch the school bus. Mom called out to him with her smile and hug in her voice "Be the one, Sammy!" Sammy paused in his hurried steps, turned and smiled in return,  and called back "Be the one, Mom!"

I heard pastor Tom Job tell this story at Young Life Family Camp a few years ago.  His wife had visited a fellow mom friend one morning.  She'd come over for a cup of coffee and I suppose just to talk.  As the other mom's children filed out the door to catch the bus for school, she called out to them in a cheerful voice "Be the one!!!" And they each turned and smiled, and returned to her "Be the one, Mom!"

Of course Tom's wife had to ask what this "be the one" business was all about.  It was so striking.  It was obvious that this little phrase held such meaning to this family.  Aren't you curious, too? Luke tells us a story in his book of the Bible about a time when Jesus came upon 10 lepers.

In those days, anyone with any skin condition was cast out of society and deemed leprous.  Totally ostracized, isolated, and outcast. The culture demanded they stay far, far away from anyone who didn't suffer these conditions.  If, by chance, you were fortunate enough to recover from your condition, you had to visit the priest to be officially declared "clean" before you could rejoin society.  It was just the custom.  The culture thought leprosy was a spiritual issue.  (This hurts my heart so much).

So one random day, Jesus was coming through their lands.  They'd heard rumors about who Jesus was.  These ten lepers stood their culturally determined distance away and called out to Him, begging for mercy.    He answered by telling them to go to the priests to show themselves, as custom dictated.  Now, in order to go to the priest, you needed to BE healed.  But the Scriptures say that they were healed "as they were going."  Did you catch it?  As?

These ten men obeyed, on faith.  Awesome job, guys!  They didn't wait for proof.  They believed and acted.  However...

"Now, one of them, when he saw that he had been healed, turned back, glorifying God with a loud voice, and he fell on his face at His feet, giving thanks to Him."  Luke 17:15-16

One.  Only one of them stopped to say thanks. Only one of them recognized what had happened and thanked and expressed his gratitude to the One who was responsible.  Only one out of ten.  Just one.  "Be the one, Mom!"

Can you imagine?  Can you imagine the pure elated joy upon the removal of this burden on your life?  To be given the gift of being with your family again?  Being with friends again?  Being in society again?  No longer outcast?  No longer detested, loathed, and ridiculed?  No longer viewed as unclean?  When you view this through the lens of the culture of that time, it is all the more a gift. It wasn't just a health condition.  And yet, all but one of them didn't stop to utter a word of thanks.

Jesus asked the one healed leper who thanked him where the other nine were.  He noticed their lack of thanks. Being a parent helps me relate to this even more.  How must it have felt to have given such an extraordinary gift, and not see one hint of gratitude?  I see this in my children, and I've worked hard to combat the selfish, entitled attitude.

This mom discovered an awesome, memorable, short phrase to use with her kids, to remind everyone (including her!) to be thankful. To pause and recognize. Let us be the one, out of all the others surrounding us, who notices what is done for us, what is sacrificed for us, what is given to us, what is shown to us. Let us be the one who responds with a cheerful tone, a smile that reaches our eyes, a touch on the shoulder, a kind and humble word to express that we noticed, we don't take it for granted, and we are thankful. 

Let's be the one.



Tom, if you are out there, thank you for sharing this story with us at Family Camp.  It made such a profound impact on my heart and has forever shaped the trajectory of my parenting when it comes to thankfulness and gratitude.  


I shot these with my Nikon D90
Nikon 85mm f1.8

taking time out to

Creativity to me is like the air I breathe.  It makes me feel alive.  It is so incredibly important to me.  And so, I value instilling creativity within my children to a grand, grand degree.  On an ordinary, every day basis, that looks like delving into the areas in which they show their own natural interest.

I will be tempted to say no... or "perhaps later".... because of all the demands on me as the mother and the home maker.  The school day heaps the challenge of time additionally onto the pile.  Such limited time between when they are home, when they need a snack, when we must accomplish homework (for both of them - and I have a mere two), when I must prep, cook, and clean up from dinner, when we must spend some play time as a family with their daddy, and then it is time for bed for the proper amount of rest that they need.   Finding time to throw caution to the wind and run the rabbit trails of their interests is hard...

But it is worth it... and necessary.

Yesterday was crazy windy.  Super crazy windy.  We entered the garage after school pickup with a "rainstorm" of leaves.  Little Buddy took off running, trying to catch one mid air.  And he did.

He ran up to me SO excited and we celebrated his awesomeness.  Then he told me, like I wasn't already aware, that you could put a leaf under paper, color over it, and draw the leaf!  So I suggested we do, just that.  I was tempted... didn't really have "time" to do that yesterday.  However, with the grand scheme of my job of mother, I don't have time NOT to embrace these things and the moments.

It was overcast.  super cloudy.  4pm.  The art room is on the other side of the house than the sun at that time of day.  That room is a wreck.  I'm not talking perfect mom's version of wreck.  I'm talking borderline hoarder wreck.  I had the idea to photograph this moment, but I hesitated again.  This wasn't really a "photography worthy" scenario.  However, it is my real. And my real is worth photographing.  

So off I went.




















I shot these with my Nikon D800
Nikon 50mm 1.4D

I am my son's mirror.

"A man has two significant mirrors in his life: 

one is his work, the other is his wife.  Looking into 

them, he asks important questions of identify, worth, 

and meaning.  Both will reflect back to him strong 

messages about his manhood.  Over time, what he 

receives from them will spell the difference between 

a life of satisfaction and a life of deep frustration." 

Robert Lewis  (1)

It is said that as a wife, I am my husband's mirror.  I reflect back to him his successes or failures.  Through my responses and behaviors towards him, I am showing him the image of who he is, and how he is doing, as a man.  I've known this for many years now and I've tried to live my role as a wife in light of this, serving my husband and encouraging him.

However, just the other day I realized I was neglecting the other male presence in my home regarding this concept.  I am also my son's mirror.  Does the man's search for a mirror to reflect back who he is just magically appear upon the wedding ceremony?  I don't think so.  As he grows and changes from baby to toddler to boy to man, while he lives in my home, as his mother, I am there.  I am present.  And I am a source of reflection back to him about his identity, worth and meaning, as a man, until he has a wife of his own some day.

I am reflecting back to him.  I am giving him a gauge for how he is becoming and doing, as a little man.  I cannot give him masculinity. I cannot teach it to him. I most certainly cannot bestow it on him.  That is something that only his dad, as another man, can do.  However, as his mirror, I can let him get a glimpse of how he is coming along in his journey, with a feminine response.  Every day he will walk another step along the line of learning to be a man, and every day I must let go a little bit more.  I do believe that through that, however, I am reflecting back to him his steps.

Is my mother-mirror the only source of his gauge for his little manhood?  Certainly not.  He gets the majority portion from his chief example of manhood:  his father.  Every single day, I see my little guy engaging in the behavior of trying to prove he is a man.  Testing himself .  He loves to 'fight' with my husband. He will well up with tears -- huge tears of sorrow and disappointment that he fights mightily to withhold -- if there is not enough time in a day to fit in that physical exertion of fighting with his dad.  Every. Single. Day.   I watch as he beats the snot out of Shawn and wonder "what on earth makes this a pleasurable experience?"  This is why I am not a man.  They both seem to just eat it up.  I recognize the necessity of this process, and words are not adequate to express how thankful I am that my son has a Daddy who will do this with him.

"Look at the stories boys love, the games they play. They are full of battle and adventure and danger. They love to build things .. then blow 'em up. They love to jump off stuff. ... Every boy wants to be a hero. Every boy wants to be powerful, he wants to be dangerous, and he wants to know: Do I have what it takes?

That's the question every boy is asking: "Do I have what it takes?"

And when he grows a bit older, it turns to fast cars (the louder the better), computer games of battle and adventure, and making the sports team. He wants to hit the home run in the bottom of the ninth. He wants to make a slam dunk just before the buzzer sounds. If he's more academically inclined, well then, he wants to win at chess; he wants to ace the test; he wants to come out on top. He wants to prove himself. And all through those years, when he's riding his bike with no hands or trying to cool cool and doing all those other things that boys do, he is looking to impress you [the dad]. 

Because every boy shares the same basic question: "Do I have what it takes?" 

And every boy looks to his dad to answer it." (2) 

John Eldredge

My son has entered the stage of transition between boy to man.  He was just born, it feels, and yet, we are on the path.  The trajectory is set.  And every day I need to let go a little bit more so that he can walk the path.

I grew up in a home that was rife with dysfunction and anger, and I was always fearful.   Fearful of the physical and emotional consequences of my behavior.  I knew I would never, ever have my children endure that.  In my home growing up, there were NO ACCIDENTS.  Period.  In my home, accidents were the result of your carelessness;  careless was not acceptable and careless was punished.  After becoming an adult, I realized this was soooooo wrong.  And I tried to change my responses when situations of accidents would arise.  However, becoming a parent has been the fire in my trial.  I never realized before just how much my own upbringing had influenced my reactions and instincts.  Facing and controlling my anger has probably been my biggest parenting struggle.  I battle anger.  But also, responding to accidents with grace has been a struggle.  It is a conscious decision on my part.


Lately, however, I've become aware of how in tune my son is to every tiny change in my facial expression.  His six year old self feels responsible for every shift in my mood, every expression in my eyes despite the set of my mouth, and every slight or heavy sigh from my lungs.

This discovery initially felt overwhelming.  How can I control something I cannot even SEE?   How can I possibly reduce my sighs?  I have my own entire language of sighs!  My sighs are my pressure relief valves, put in place to help me curb that pesky anger I'm tenuously holding onto.

However, this is too big of a deal.  I must gain control over the body language and subconscious communications I'm sending to my children.   He watches me.  Always.  Wanting to know what I'm feeling.  Because he has internalized what "I" feel as HIS responsibility.  And that is not right.

Just the other day... we all got into the van and they were buckling up.  However, he wasn't paying attention.  He accidentally buckled a tissue into the locking mechanism of the seat belt.  It wouldn't lock, and the tissue wouldn't come out.   So he hesitantly told me that he wasn't buckled.

I closed my eyes and sighed, because it was inconvenient to ME to have to stop the van, get out, open the sliding back door, climb in, and try to pull a tissue out of the seat belt locking mechanism.  I couldn't get it out with my fingers, so I ended up using a pair of tweezers (that happened to be in the van from the time he ran his hand down a wooden pole outside Chili's and got a splinter.  I wasn't there, but I'm sure I would have made some 'wonderful' facial expressions that day, as well, if I had been).  No big deal, but inconvenient.

"Are you mad at me?"

"NO!  NO, little man, no.  I am SOOOOO not mad at you.  It was totally an accident.  But sometimes accidents are still inconvenient.  My face is expressing that, but it isnt directed at YOU"

But actions speak louder than words, don't they?

What I have learned is... I've done a poor, poor job of controlling MYSELF.  Controlling my OWN responses in order to not reflect emotions that they cannot possibly comprehend at such young ages.   Because of my lack of control, my six year old has a complex that requires him to be perfect at all times, and collapses and withdraws when he cannot comply with his expectations of perfection.

He is such an awesome little guy.  I watch in utter wonder as he is taking those steps into masculinity, testing his limits, exerting himself against his daddy, asking "Do I have what it takes?"  It hurts to let go, and yet, there's such beauty in it and the way God designed it all.  I love watching Shawn begin the process of bestowing that masculinity.  Through all of this, I want to reflect to my son, when he looks to me as the feminine presence in his life right now, his true masculinity:  his little budding muscles.  His strength.  His perseverance.  His intelligence.   His capability.  With a good dose of tenderness, too.    I want to reflect his growth and changes as he become a man who can protect, provide and care for another woman some day.  I cannot give him his masculinity, but I can reflect back to him that a woman will one day find what he has to offer is of great value.

I pray that I haven't made irrevocable errors in my mothering to my son.  I pray that God will fill me with wisdom and strength as I tiptoe down the path behind my son, letting him find his way to masculinity.  I pray that God reveals to me those times when I'm not controlling my emotions, my responses, right down to my facial expressions and sighs.  I pray that the reflection I show my son in his mirror is real, authentic, and who he truly is.


(1) Robert Lewis and William Hendricks, 1998.  Rocking the Roles: Building a Win-Win Marriage, Navpress, p 120, chapter 15.

(2) John Eldredge, 2004.  You Have What It Takes: What Every Father Needs to Know, p 2, chapter 1.

Rewind - 2011 Topsail Island Vacation wrap up

Our last day on the beach, some pool time, and exploring the fishing pier.  It has been so fun to look back on this vacation from 2011.






The grown up guys did a lot of beach fishing on this trip, and ended up catching this little shark.  For real.



Of course Shawn had to bury the kids in the sand.  They loved it.



This was the trip where we really took off on learning to swim.  Fun to see him when he was much more hesitant.





And the pier, as we were heading out of town.

Rewind - Topsail Island Beach Vacation in 2011

I remember being so excited to take all the kids back out around sunset, back in June 2011, when we were visiting Topsail Island, NC on vacation with our good friends.  It was such a fun evening.  We played and enjoyed the beach when sun wasn't the big concern.  We played a lively round of Duck Duck Goose, and let me say, that the ocean and sand and duck duck goose make a fantastic combination.

All of these beach images I've been posting were batch edited.  It comes down to a matter of time for me.  Also, they were batch edited back in 2011.  I see now as I look back how dark they are - under exposed.  My poor little D90 was trying as hard as he could.  The ISO is the part of the D800 I love the most.  But I also see as I went through the images to select the ones to show here.... my D90 was struggling with focus, even back in 2011.  Soooooo many images the focus was soooo terribly wrong.  Amazing how clear it is when I look back - how long I struggled as an artist when it was the equipment that was failing me.

What I love most about these images in this post is how they transport me back in time to that amazing evening.  Yes, of course, I have the memory of the night we spent at sunset on the beach.  But seeing the images - now I remember the ramp down to the beach, the perpetual grin the Little Lady had on her face when she saw the ocean, how Little Buddy refused to hold still and let me get a shot of his EYES, so the one I ended up getting has him pretending to pick his nose, the Duck Duck Goose, the splashing, the JOY.  It is this that makes me fall in love with photography every single day.