Project 26 | post 18 | Strength

I know for certain how I learned of this verse of Scripture.  You see, my high school mascot was an Eagle.  This set of verses from Isaiah 40 was often used at school to encourage us Mighty Eagles.  Every time I read or hear these divinely inspired words, goose bumps break out all over my skin.

They Shall Mount Up With Wings Like Eagles!!!

The power and promise and demonstration in these words.  It awes me, and it encourages me.  Perhaps part of it is the nostalgia.  In some ways it is as if hearing these words transports me back in time, sitting in an auditorium filled with other young people, and feeling the hope and determination that no matter what I've come from, I can do anything with my life if I put my mind to it.



The theme for my Project 26 this week is Strength.  Whenever I hear the word 'strength', those verses in Isaiah 40 come to my mind.  Always.  While Galations 6:9 is my "parenting verse", this is my "life verse".  I can lean on it in times when I feel weak. In times when I feel doubt.  I can be reassured that it is through the Lord God that I have any strength at all.




I knew as soon as I saw this theme back in January that I'd be doing something for this verse in some way.  Little Buddy loves to pretend he has wings to fly and has often used a blanket for his imaginations. To trusty Amazon I went to look for Eagle Wings, and Eagle Wings I did find! Eagle Wings Costume  The wings were his reward for helping me with my "photography projects".  He LOVES them.  He wore them every day for the first few days.  And man, can he ever squawk.





The Little Lady, of course, wanted a turn as well.  She doesn't enjoy them very much, though.  She leaves them to Little Buddy for the most part.











I cannot believe this beautiful kid is mine.










Next up in my group project is my California friend Krista.  Poor Krista has had a bunch of crazy things happen in her life lately.  The fact that she still found a way to get this theme done and posted on time is testament to her own inner Strength!  Kind of funny though, is that my own facebook status yesterday about the Little Lady waking up way too stinking early these days inspired her images for our next theme:  Struggle.  There was a little confusion in the group about whether it was Strength or Struggle this time around.  So take a look at Krista's Struggle, and maybe in two weeks we'll see her take on Strength! Krista Keller | Danville CA Child and Family Photographer

I shot these with my D90  Nikon 85mm f1.8

Food Styling Challenge | August | Summer Dessert - Slushie Popsicles

I love my The Inspired Plate ladies.  We've grown close over these last 8 months.  We've learned a ton. We've shared a lot, both photographically and artistically, as well as personally.  August has brought us to Summer Desserts as our challenge theme.

Confession time.  I've had a hard time getting myself motivated for this one.  I haven't been able to put my finger on why, but this was one I wasn't super excited to do.  Nothing was striking me.  I felt overwhelmed at the idea of trying to style a dessert and do it well, compared to all the amazingness that is out in the land of the internet.  I didn't feel... well... inspired.  If I were coaching my children, I'd be giving a nice stern talking-to about such a defeatist attitude....

Then I remembered my popsicles.  My summer supertastic Slushie Popsicles.




In the spring I discovered this awesome Slushie recipe.  I grew up on Kool-aid, but we don't drink it here at our house.  However, the kids and I have been enjoying the occasional Slushie this summer using the red-Pitcher-man envelopes thanks to that recipe.  Well, the generic red-Pitcher-man envelopes.  The envelopes are the key.  The secret is making a concentrate. Just like fantastic iced coffee needs coffee concentrate... and YoungLife WindyGap Cheerwine Slushies require the concentrated syrup not available to us lowly consumers  in order to not be a watered down disaster... a good Slushie needs concentrate to go with all that ice.  With this recipe and the envelopes, I can make my own "syrup" so to speak, and I can control the sugar content.  Bonus!  Water, Ice, sugar and a kool-aid packet, in the blender.  What could be easier?

I need to check the price of sugar, and I need to confirm the cost of a Slushie at the local drive in...  but, this is WAY cheaper and just as delicious.

A bag of sugar costs ~$4?  I need to check that.
A bag of sugar will make 16 batches of slushies.  yes, I wrote batches, as in enough for all four of us.
16 envelopes of generic koo-laid cost me ~$2.

So for ~$6 we have SIXTEEN batches of slushies... um, SCORE.  About 38 cents a batch.  (again, I'll confirm up my numbers next time I hit WallyWorld, but you get my drift).   Less than a dime a person!  Take that, local drive in with the red straws!

But then one day I got an idea.  The Lady loves popsicles, but I hate paying so much for the pre-made ones.  I've never been a fan of the homemade rock hard block of ice break your teeth popsicles...  What if I used the Slushie as the fluid to go into the popsicle mold?   Perhaps if I used Slushie as the base... it would be different and not rock hard.

Yes.  yes, indeed.  It is perfection!!!





It has worked so well this summer.  The texture of the popsicle is just perfect, especially for the kiddos.  The flavor is super and intense.  I can control the sugar content so it isn't so crazy.  Blogging this discovery has been on my list of todo's for... oh, just the entire summer.  Suddenly it occurred to me that I could combine my Food Styling Challenge with my desire to spread the cheer of the awesomeness of Slushie Popsicles.  Here ya go!  However, it seems the odds were stacked against me for this month's post.

I made the popsicles the night before.  In all the colors.  I started with a packet I had used previously where I'd halved the recipe, so 1 cup of water with the sugar and kool-aid mix, instead of the 2 cups for a full recipe.  (Hint:  mix the water and sugar mix in the blender first to dissolve the sugar and avoid gritty slushie.  Then add the ice.)  So, I used 1 cup water and then 2 cups of ice.  Everything looked right.  I poured into the mold and set up shop for the next color.  Yellow (lemonade).  Then Blue (Blue Raspberry).  Then Orange (Peach mango).  Then Red (Fruit Punch).



Then as I was prepping the Green (Lemon-Lime) ones, I realized I'd made a mistake.  A mistake I couldn't recover from.  I was using the water and ice measurements for a half recipe... but was making a full recipe.  So my concentrate just became super jacked up concentrate.  I did the correct measurements for the Green ones... and really hoped that my mistake was going to turn out as one of those happy happy accidents.  I know that when things are chilled and frozen, the flavor needs to be more intense to combat the cold.  I held out hope.

We had gorgeous golden hour sunlight the two nights before the popsicle shoot day.  Of course now that time was up, we had lovely overcast skies.  That means that not only do I miss that beautiful backlit glow, I get to battle white balance like mad with my camera.  Sigh.  When it became time to shoot the "styled" popsicles and let the kids eat them, only one of the six popsicles came out clean.  Only ONE!  I was sooooo frustrated!  That's what I get for a new mold (this one), I suppose, and not practicing first.  I guess this was kind of like making a new recipe for company.  Not a wise move.  So I had to shoot what I had.  With frustrating lighting.   As far as my recipe mistake -- the super duper jacked up concentrated concentrate Slushie popsicles... well, that did turn out well.



I may add a tad bit more water/ice next time I make them, but reducing the water/ice content for the popsicle variety was great for the Popsicle Version.  The kids and Dad were quite pleased.  They finished up probably one of our last summer Slip 'n Slide evenings by enjoying them... all six of them.











Cliche as it is, by the end, the Lady had turned into a popsicle.  She was shivering so hard she kept asking me if I could hear her teeth!  Chattering away!  I think she thought it was worth it.





Please visit the rest of my The Inspired Plate comrades and see what they created, styled, and photographed for our Summer Dessert theme.  I know I cannot wait to see what Jen Olson | San Luis Obispo, Ca Food Photographer has waiting for us!  (and keep going to find poor Sabrina!  She's in Australia and having to style a summer dessert in the middle of her winter!)

I shot these with my D90 Sigma 30mm f1.4 &  Nikon 50mm 1.4D

legos in the bathtub

No.

Sometimes it feels that all I say is 'no'. I know I say it more often than I should.  I say it rather frequently these days, actually.  No, we cannot do the slip 'n slide right now.  No, you cannot have chocolate chips for breakfast.  No, you cannot have pickles either.  No, you cannot play with play doh right now.  No, we can't go to the Splash Pad.  Or the Park.  Or Sally's house.  No, you can't watch that on tv.  No, you can't play on my phone.  No, we can't buy that cereal.  No, you can't have a new toy.  No, you cannot play Super Mario right now.  No, you can't stay up late.  No, we can't look at your party stuff on the computer (she likes to see her Pinterest board).  No, we can't make a craft right now.  No, you can't have a popsicle.  No, we can't do that.  No, you can't do this.  And then my personal nemesis... No, you may not paint right now.

Sometimes the reason is valid - like chocolate chips for breakfast.  Few are those who would argue this one.  Or the request is asked while in the middle of cooking dinner and it is physically impossible to do the requested activity without me.  But most of the time, if I'm well and truly honest, there is no good reason to say 'no'.  The real root of the 'no' answer is my own selfishness and laziness.

These denied requests are almost always activity based.  Because it will take a huge effort to prepare the activity, then require immense supervision (which doesn't allow me to multitask, which is counter to my type-A overachiever personality) for an extended period of time, and lastly (my biggest de-motivator) once it is all over, leaves me with additional mess to clean up..... nearly always my default answer has been "no".

I am fairly certain I read the story of Legos in the bathtub in the book _Professionalizing Motherhood_ by Jill Savage.  I read it years ago before the Lady was born and when Little Buddy was very, very tiny and no where near playing with Legos.  Yet, the story struck quite a chord in me.  Her children had asked to play with legos in the bathtub.  The instinct reaction was to say "no!", because that is quite an absurd request, PLUS then mom has to clean up the additional mess.  But Savage challenged us to say "yes" more.... when the request was one that didn't have negative consequences (like chocolate chips for breakfast)... and required more of me to make it happen... to answer "yes" more.  Not necessarily every time.  But more often.   I planned to remember this, as my children grew.  Remember to let them do the creative things they dreamt up, even when it inconvenienced me.

Fast forward a few years and I've forgotten.  It is so tempting to become caught up in my whirlwind of achievement.  It is so easy to try to minimize the damage control.  I am weary of cleaning up messes!  I am weary of cleaning up the very same messes - over and over and over again.  Perhaps it is the engineer part of me that screams on the inside how crazy it is to add more mess to the ordinary, to keep repeating the same activities and never, ever, see progress.  When they ask, my mind is yelling inside of me "I don't want to do 'that'" (selfish).  "I don't want to take time away from what _I_ need to get done" (selfish).  "I don't want to have to set it all up and prepare" (lazy).  "I don't want to be tied down to this activity for x hours" (selfish).  "I don't want to have to clean it all up" (lazy).  "I don't want to experience the ramifications of adjusting what I had intended to do that day, because the time constraints have changed"(selfish).

I don't want to raise self-centered children.  I'm not suggesting we become slaves to their whims or that they get to do everything they ask as soon as they ask it.  I'm just reminding myself that sometimes I need to suck it up, as the mom.  If the motivator behind my 'no' is "I don't want to mess with that today"... perhaps I should rethink my answer that time.  Especially when my Quality Time child asks to spend TIME with me in an activity.  She's giving me an opportunity to love her, and express my love to her in a way her little heart and mind understand.  I cannot let that pass us by.

Yesterday.

Yesterday, she asked to paint in the morning.  I didn't want to mess with it.  She loves to paint.  I mean, loooooooves it.  But there is all the prep work, watching her while she does it so paint doesn't get where it shouldn't, and then the dreaded clean up.  Man, I cannot explain it, but I detest cleaning up from painting!!!  I love to paint, myself, and I love to craft.  I have anxiously awaited the days when we could do these things together.  But the reality is that I nearly always avoid it, because it feels like it will be such a hassle.  Yesterday I used my classic deflection technique.  "Oooooh!  that is a great idea!  We'll do that after lunch."  They will often forget, and I didn't have to say 'no'.  Ridiculous method of guilt avoidance.

Around four in the afternoon, she remembered.

Guilt motivated me to let her.  That's why I said yes.  Not because it is something a four year old should get to do occasionally.  Not because she loves to paint.  Not because I wanted her to have fun and foster her creativity and artistic side.  I said yes because I felt guilty.  Guilty for trying to deflect her.  Guilty for hardly ever letting her do these activities.  Guilty for not giving her the time and attention she deserves.  That's a horrible time to start craft projects.  I need to be preparing for dinner, not embarking on a long drawn out process that is very labor intensive for me.  But yesterday guilt won out and I started setting up for painting.

She was sooooo excited.  Soooo happy.  She pulled out my paint box from the cabinet.  She selected several colors that she wanted to use.  She even pulled out the paintbrushes she liked to go with each color.  She pulled out the palette thing to put the paint in.  She even moved the stool she likes to use over to the easel for her to sit on.  She didn't say so, but I know she was just trying to help - make it easier on me.  Already I've let her know she inconveniences me.  She feels she is a burden to me.

I put paper on the easel, put the paint in the palette, and put her smock on.  I got a wet paper towel and instructed her that if paint got ANYWHERE she was to wipe it up.  I got a cup for her to place the paintbrushes while they rested.  I let her begin and went back to the chair to finish whatever it was I was working on on the computer.  A few minutes so later, I spun around in the chair to check on things and saw this:





I was just struck.

Captivated.  One of those pivotal moments in your parenting that I can feel even now, the day after.  I can feel the sunlight streaming in the room.  I can see her cute little body curled under her.  I can see her perched on the stool, focused, intent, and creating.  I can see her soaking in the beauty of this world and her little life that God has given her.  I can smell the tang of acrylic paint.

I almost denied her this.

Because of my selfishness and laziness, I almost missed this.  She almost missed this.  It seriously felt magical in the room.  My camera was right beside me on the desk, so I grabbed and stole a shot, just to preserve the memory.  It has been quite a while, truthfully, since I've shot my children with my camera, especially for something like this.  I feel so behind in my to do list, so behind on commitments... and when I'm behind, I don't shoot.  That takes time and I just don't have it these days, or so it feels.  I sat the camera back down and started to go back to work.  But I couldn't deny the magic of the moment there in the office.  I picked the camera back up and shot a few more.  Then I stood up and shot some more.  I downloaded the images off the card.  But she was still painting.  And I was still mesmerized with her.  So I put the card back in the camera, and shot some more.  It felt so wonderful to just shoot to document a moment again.  I think I lost a little of that with the workshop earlier in the summer.  I sat the camera back down, went back to the computer and opened up a new window to start this blog.

"Mama, I want you to take pitchurs of me again."

Of course I knew she realized I was taking pictures of her.  But I didn't realize she enjoyed it.  She relished it.  It communicated something to her.  You better believe I picked up that camera and continued to shoot.

In _Captivating_ by John and Stasi Eldredge, the authors speak of how every little girl twirls.  She twirls for her father, and others, so as to ask "Am I lovely?  Am I beautiful?  Am I worth loving?  Do you see me?  Do you want to see me?  Do I captivate you?"  Those questions will haunt her, even as she grows into a woman.  I thanked God for bringing that book into my life for a million reasons, but one of which was for this very point.  I knew when I had a daughter I wouldn't blow off her twirling.  I wouldn't gloss over it.  It is easy to smile and nod and continue on.  But I decided I would stop and admire her and let her know she IS lovely.  She IS beautiful.  She IS worthy.  She DOES captivate me. I want to see her.

When she said to me yesterday "Mama, I want you to take pitchurs of me again", for the second time that afternoon I was stuck.  She was twirling for me.  While the Little Lady certainly does twirl on occasion and does enjoy the color pink, I wouldn't say she's a super girly-girl.  If she does twirl, I do stop and admire her and verbally affirm her.  But yesterday I realized she was twirling.  She was twirling for me, with her paintbrush.  She was reveling in her mama taking the time to take her picture.  Her mama with her million demands was taking time aside to take her picture.  For that moment, she felt my top priority.  I was telling her with my actions with my camera that she was lovely. She is beautiful.  She is worth loving.  I see her.  I want to see her.  I am utterly captivated by her.  I enjoy her.  Her mama was delighting in her.

Even beyond the difference it made in her was the difference it made in me.  I enjoyed it.  It wasn't a burden (though I still hated cleaning the brushes and the palette).  I loved shooting it with my camera.  It made me happy to do this with her.  All of the anticipatory annoyances.... weren't there.  It was a wonderful thing and I'm so glad I pushed aside my instinct to say no.

What a day yesterday was. I challenge myself and I challenge you, my reader, to say yes more.  Let them do the things that make your life harder.  Communicate to them that they are worth your time, your effort, and your love.  May I continue to remember this as we move forward.

I shot these with my D90 & Sigma 30mm f1.4

Project 26 | Post 17 | Me and Mine

Back in July, I handed the camera over to Little Buddy using our method.  What is my method?  I'm so glad you asked!!!

I tie my PhatStrap in a knot so that the camera is close to his face and body and it can't swing away from him.  I change the settings off of back button focus to shutter release button focus.  I set an aperture and ISO, and turn the camera to aperture priority mode.  I move the focus point to the center (he hasn't figured out other compositions just yet).  Switch the shooting mode to one of the NOT continuous modes (otherwise I'll get 20 of the exact same image, as he will hold the button down).  And tell him to go!

Little Buddy LOVES when we do this.  LOVES it.  This time I asked if he would shoot me with the Little Lady for my next Me & Mine.  We were playing in the playroom.  I was bouncing her up and down while she sat on my belly.  She was dying laughing.  Little Buddy never quite captured the motion of it all, but I still love what he did.  Treasures.  Just treasures.  There are so few images that include me.




Of course I must include a shot of my photographer, even if it is missed focus.

I shot these with my D90 Sigma 30mm f1.4

Next up on my group circle:  Krista Keller, Danville CA Child and Family Photographer