tutu heaven

Two new tutu sets arrived in February from my favorite Etsy seller. I received them in exchange for some amazing product images for her Etsy site, and I've been SOOOO excited to shoot Cora in them. They are just gorgeous. The craftsmanship is spectacular, which the images really don't show unfortunately. We waited and waited and waited for it to get warm enough for us to venture outside to take them....

And it did. And I began to try. And I failed. And failed. And failed.

"I", as the mom, can NOT take 'for real' images of my kids. Period. I've done this a few times for a few things, and I find it BEYOND frustrating. I totally, totally loose my cool. They refuse to cooperate. It's a horrible experience. For everybody.

I love to capture life. I personally dislike posed images, and I hate trying to take them even more. "I" can't. It is NOT my gift.

So I TRIED to merge capturing life with getting the right kind of product shots for her Etsy shop. And try after try after try -- fail fail fail. I even had Shawn try to help me one time, and it was still a big bust. Cora and all her strong willed issues meant she was NOT going to do it. Period. Ripping the wings off. Snapping the wands in two. yanking the head piece off before my hand left her head. HORRIBLE. And I was SO angry. And so ugly.

But because I'd accepted the products, I felt PRESSURE to do it. I had toyed with the idea of asking a friend's slightly older (and significantly more submissive) child to come over and let me get them with her. But then, I'd have to compensate her in some way and it got all complicated in my head. And I just decided... forget it. I'll just email Etsy seller friend, let her know I tried but I failed and I'm a hack, and offer her twice what the tutus would have cost her due to the lost time in having the images so she could get them on her site.

I hadn't sent the email yet. I had decided the day or two before this. It was after dinner and I was almost finished cleaning up. It had been a dreary day all day. Shawn looked out the window and says "it looks like gorgeous light outside... looks like a good time to try to get some tutu pictures."

Against everything inside me -- because I'm an ultra planner and I wasn't expecting this -- I RAN with it. And because I'd decided I was done with it already anyway, the pressure was off. Shawn had some AWESOME ideas on basically how to trick Cora into cooperating so she didn't think she was doing what we wanted. I had the great idea to let Nathan have his wish to wear the wings (he's entered the dress up phase and we NEED to get some BOY dress up gear), which means that Cora then decided they were a hot ticket item. She wore the head pieces the ENTIRE TIME WE WERE OUTSIDE. It was just incredible. I'm so glad I didn't give up and I'm so glad I was able to let the PRESSURE on myself subside. I think that was probably a big part of the problem -- fear of failing, which only made me fail.

Through it all I learned some really valuable artistic lessons about myself. And I got these priceless, priceless images of my princess. Today I'll share my favorites from tutu set one.

one of my favorite shots of her ever. I am in love with the expression on her face here.

I love Shawn's smiling face in the background of this one.

I shot these with my D90 and the Tamron 28-75 f2.8 lens.

amazing. miraculous. beautiful.

I already posted Susanna's newborn images quite a while ago. But well before that, I visited the lovely family for my first experience with documenting maternity. I was very excited, because mommy-to-be is just an infectious and beautiful person, and I hoped to get some amazing artistic shots. I was soooo ready to experiment, play, and be challenged. When I arrived for the shoot, however, mommy-to-be surprised me by requesting NOT to have any belly shots.

I'll admit it. This totally threw me for a loop. I mean... to ME, that's what a maternity session would BE about. All about the belly!!! I kind of wish I had a picture of what MY face looked like when I made this discovery that morning at their house!

It's been nearly two years since I had a pregnant belly myself. I'm still just in utter awe of the beauty of it. It's so amazing. Miraculous. And beautiful. I wanted very much to document my belly artistically the first time around. (Tina Wilson did it for me and those images are priceless to me. They rock!) Part of the driver for that was the problems we had getting pregnant in the first place -- I didn't know if I'd ever get to experience it again and I wanted to soak in every possible second of it. (the second time, I didn't feel quite as beautiful... I'll admit that, too. so I didn't want it documented quite so much. hehehe)

But this beautiful woman? She's very modest. Plain and simple -- that was why she didn't want images of her belly. I respect that. I don't relate, but I respect it. But, man, was I disappointed!

Before the end of the session, her husband finally convinced her to show me her belly. So I did capture some absolutely beautiful shots that I'm quite proud of. I hope that in the end, years later, she will be so glad she did this. That this precious, precious fleeting time in her life is at least preserved with beautiful images that she can refer back to and remember. Every curve. Every freckle. The belly button. The line. I so appreciate her willingness to step WAY outside of her comfort zone for me -- to let me experiment artistically. I know it was super hard for her and I'm thankful she allowed me to try.

Unfortunately, she's not quite comfortable with letting me show them here on my blog. And I'll admit too that I'm SUPER bummed about that. But I do have some less revealing shots to share. If you're reading, do comment and let this mama know how gorgeous she is!

I shot these with my Nikon D90 and my Nikon 50mm f/1.8D Lens.

Spur one another on

This will be short and sweet.  This family has meant so very much to me since I met them in.... well, I don't even know if it was 2002?  2003?  It's been a long time.  She has always been there for me, right in the moments of sheer desperation, knowing exactly what to say and how to say it.  Being able to bring about conviction in my heart while still encouraging me and helping me see that there is light.  Knowing that there is a heart out there that knows almost exactly how I feel and has experienced the same completely frustrating and conflicting emotions is comforting beyond description.  She has been my Hebrews 10:24 coach:  "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds."  She has spurred me more than I can count.

This session was for a very special and specific purpose that should come to fruition very soon, and that my friends, is very exciting.  I am so very grateful that God placed this family in our path all those years ago, and I'm so grateful that I have been a teeny tiny part of the miracle God is working on their lives.